Weard pf.conf isue wen opening port for remote access

For a friend who host a game server i create localy a SQL database for
fetching stats, so i created below rule

pass in quick on $ext_if proto { tcp,udp } from (ip adres here) to
$ext_if port 3306 rdr-to 192.168.0.228


after a pfctl the database returnd a sql error, that it was unable to
connect to it.

So i created a 2nd rule set (and did a # in front of the 1st rule)

pass in quick on $ext_if proto { tcp,udp } from any to $ext_if port 3306
rdr-to 192.168.0.228

And yes, a connection was made.

so, i revered the settings, i dont want unwanted hammering on my sql server.
all went well, no isues.
so i set up the 2nd pool connection.
and again, NO connection possible, and the 1st pool also died with it.


what am i doing wrong so remote connection are possible ?

any suggestions ?

Tony.